Reason #2450 Why Everything’s Better in Sweden

The Ultimate All-Purpose Lip-Balm

I don’t normally wax quite so enthusiastic about consumer products in such a public forum, but tonight, I just have to rave about this fantastic Swedish lip balm.

It’s called Försvarets Hudsalva, which means The Military’s Skin Cream. The Swedish national drugstore monopoly, Apoteket, manufactures it and, as far as I know, is the only place where you can purchase it.

There are only two sizes available — big and little (more technically 25 ml and 9 ml) — and only one flavor — an inoffensive vanilla. With the exception of BHT (an additive that keeps the balm from going rancid), the formula is reassuringly low-tech: beef tallow, peanut oil, wax, ascorbic and scorbic acids, vanillin and vitamin E. So it’s not vegan, and people with peanut allergies probably shouldn’t use it but, otherwise it’s fairly innocuous stuff.

The packaging is delightfully austere: green plastic tubes with white Helvetica lettering and a white cap. You dispense the lip balm by pushing up from the bottom, like with one of those old-style push-up deodorant sticks. The only downside of the design is the cap, which has a tendency to fall off in my bag so that my pens and wallet and calendar get greasy.

The instructions on the packaging mention using it on your lips, elbows and heels, but a visit to Apoteket’s Web site lists some of the more unorthodox uses:

From the beginning the salve was meant to be used by Swedish soldiers to heal painful blisters. But it can also be put to such diverse uses as waxing skis, oiling bicycle chains, and, of course, you can fry sausage in it.

Really though, the most important thing you need to know is that I woke up with chapped lips yesterday, and today they are soft and smooth.